I've always enjoyed reading other people's blogs, but never thought to start one of my own. Perhaps it is that my life hasn't felt exciting enough to blog about! Up until recently... Recently, Dan and I have decided to pursue a domestic infant adoption to start our family.
I've always assumed that when I got married, we'd just have babies. After all, that's how God created us, to be fruitful and multiply! But after a year of trying with no pregnancy, I started to wonder if I'd be one of those women who couldn't have children. I figured it would happen the following year.... After 2 years of trying with no success, I got scared. We had all of the tests run on both of us, with the lovely diagnosis of unexplained infertility. "There's no reason you guys shouldn't get pregnant," we were told.
Here we are at 3 years of 'trying' without a pregnancy. The first year and a half were tough, I cried every month I wasn't pregnant, and I would often wonder what was wrong with me. I prayed for patience and contentment, and Praise the Lord, he gave that to me! I no longer cried every month, and accepted the fact that we weren't getting pregnant, and perhaps never would be. I was truly at peace about it. Dan would remind me of this verse, and I rested on it, "And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose." (Romans 8:28) So I focused my attention on where I was at; as a wife. "Whatsoever thy hand findeth to do, do it with thy might." Eccl. 9:10. With all my might I tried to be the best help meet for Dan I could be, how I might better please my husband! I even lost 33 lbs. in the process, and I feel wonderful! Dan and I have enjoyed the years of just the two of us, and have grown stronger in our marriage through this time, and for that I am thankful! Through all of this though, we have never lost the desire to be parents.
At the beginning of our infertility struggles, Dan and I had talked about adoption, and the fact that we would both love it. We would both love any child that was given to us as flesh and blood. The thing we didn't love about it was the price tag! It never really seemed like a possibility because we simply couldn't afford it.
A few weeks ago, I was reading in Matthew 25, when He says, (vs. 35-36) "For I was an hungered, and ye gave me meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me drink: I was a stranger, and ye took me in, naked, and ye clothed me: I was sick, and ye visited me: I was in prison, and ye came unto me." (vs. 40) "verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me." I broke down crying reading those verses. I felt like we should "take in a stranger," and to welcome a child into our home. "God setteth the solitary in families." Psalm 68:6.
As the wife, I'm not the one to make such big decisions, but I knew I need to share my thoughts with Dan, and see where he was at again with adoption. When he got home from work, I shared with him what God had shown me that afternoon. Praise the Lord, God had been impressing adoption on his heart as well! We both felt like now was the time to start pursuing this, trusting the Lord to provide for every step of the way.
We are taking the first step and going to an adoption information meeting in April. We have no idea how it is all going to work, and try not to get overwhelmed with all of the information. We are trusting the Lord, and waiting on Him!
"Oh that men would praise the Lord for his goodness, and for his wonderful works to the children of men!" Psalm 107:8
God is good,